Tag Archives: mental-health

Massive Let Down… But Summers Already Here.

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Hello Y’all. I hope you are doing well in your corner of the world. The Fourth of July holiday is a day away, and it’s going to be a nice, long weekend with cool temperatures and fun. But if you’re in the States, you have been hearing of massive layoffs and cuts going on recently across the board. It’s hard on people, and it’s even harder on families. But what are they going to do about it? Summer is already here, there are things to do, vacations to take, and plans to be executed. If you’ve lived long enough and worked for any length of time, you should have experienced at least one layoff. We’ve all been there, and the first reaction is panic.

Questions like ‘What will I do? How will I live? How will the bills be paid? Vacations are already planned?’ runs through your mind, and some immediately start putting out applications in panic mode, which isn’t the worst thing to do, but I’d love to share some tips on a better approach to dealing with this than what I’ve experienced and witnessed in the past.

Helpful Tips from Yours Truly.

Try to decompress and get over the initial panic – know that layoffs happen.

Realise that companies will always put themselves first, no matter your loyalty or dedication. In this day and age, most companies aren’t like they used to be. Many view their employees as numbers and not people with families and responsibilities. So be shrewd, take your breaks, have boundaries; if you work for a ‘taking company’, return the same energy.

Do a quick snapshot of your current financial status, including bills, savings, debt, investments, etc. If you have been responsible in the past, financial institutions are more likely to work with you on certain commitments and reduce some of the initial stress.

Let your immediate family know. This is a tricky one because sometimes, the affected individual doesn’t want to panic the other members of the family. But this doesn’t always help. Communicating effectively helps with better decision making, especially incorporating cutbacks and conserving existing finances.

It’s OK to have rollercoaster emotions and down days. Take time to feel your feelings, but don’t stay there.

Reprioritize. Being laid off is not always a bad thing. Sometimes it brings families together or gives birth to a new business idea that may provide better stability.

Be optimistic. Life is full of ups and downs, and sometimes the down times are where we really get to reflect; and we don’t have the noise around us to distract us. Some of the best decisions I’ve ever made were made during down times, when I was able to chart the course of my next steps as I emerged from the rut I was in. Once things returned to normal, it was smooth sailing. I already had a plan and a charted course and was not distracted by the passing frivolities that tend to distract us along the way.

Find a way to enjoy your Summer break. It doesn’t have to be all doom and gloom. You are alive, you’re healthy, and have people who love and care about you; that’s more than enough to give you the boost to get up and make it in life. There are so many fun things to do that are great if you’re on a budget. Finding fun and cost-effective ways to get through the tough times makes you stronger, not just mentally but all around in life.

Folks, I have been spur-of-the-moment baking these past weeks and haven’t had time to share some of the pictures. I made a very simple GF Carrot Cake.

I hope you enjoy. Until I come your merry way again, I remain,

Periwinkle Starr

The Beauty Industries Evolution – A Wild Reality

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Hello Y’all! It’s Father’s Day today, and I want to extend a shout-out to all the good and amazing Fathers out here. Where would we be without our Dads? Meanwhile, the weather is beautiful out here in North Texas; we have a gentle breeze wafting through our porch, and it’s divine. My post today is quite sensitive, and something we can all relate to. Being a millennial and watching the technological evolution manifest right before my eyes, the beauty industry has not been exempt from these innovations. *Just to make a disclaimer that I’m not in any way against technology, in fact, it has done a whole lot of good for the industry, but there is a fine line between sanity and absolute bonkers that we are going to look into here.

Plastic Surgery – The Dawn of Possibilities

I first heard about the term ‘plastic surgery’, it was mentioned alongside Michael Jackson, the King of Pop, back then. He had undergone what was coined Rhinoplasty to repair his nose that got broken during a rehearsal accident in 1979, way before my time, but something I noticed growing up as he got more work done. At that time, it was something that music stars and celebrities were getting into, which, in my opinion, made sense because they had to be in the public eye, and being youthful meant longevity in the entertainment industry. But unbeknownst to the majority of the public, there was a plan to market the possibilities of beauty enhancements available to the general public, and using celebrities was the gateway. It would be extremely lucrative to create this ideal of what the perfect body on a woman or man should be, and a fast way to achieve it with less effort.

The Kardashians – The Downfall of Natural Beauty

In 2007, the show Keeping Up with the Kardashians came onto the Reality TV scene. A family made popular first by the fact that the patriarch, Robert Kardashian, was the lawyer for O.J. Simpson during the murder trial of his wife. The Kardashian ladies were the ‘it’ girls back then. We all wanted to dress like them, talk like them, and some went as far as trying to look like them. They glamorized Botox, fillers, BBLs – Brazilian Butt Lifts, breast implants, coolsculpting – a non invasive fat reduction procedure, vaginoplasty, Mummy Makeover – A full body upgrade and much more. “If that part of the body could be reached, it could be tweaked”. This was the message insinuated on that show, and in my opinion, the downward spiral had begun.

Pop-Up Clinics, Quack Doctors, and Affordable Overseas Options

I remember when I could count the number of Plastic Surgery institutes and clinics in my county, but now there’s one in literally every corner offering solutions with payment plan options. We have all heard of women who cannot afford these clinics settling for quack doctors in shanty apartments and hotel rooms, to those ladies traveling overseas to developing countries offering cheaper rates for the same procedures. Back in the day, people were somewhat more content with their overall physical appearance than they are today. You did the best with what you had, and many sacrificed by exercising, dieting, and using more natural remedies.

Ramifications of these Trends

No one is talking about the health implications of these substances in our bodies. Not many are allowed to voice their less-than-pleasant experiences after undergoing these procedures. There is a high risk of cancers and many more debilitating illnesses due to these procedures. People have literally changed their total appearance with no resemblance to their ethnicity or family. But it doesn’t stop there. We have those who suffer from body dysmorphia and have literally gone over the edge with these procedures, and look nothing short of hideous.

A few months ago, a study officially came out on fillers, which are dermal injectable treatments that can enhance facial features and improve the overall appearance of the face are now reportedly an issue. These injectables, which can be silicone, hyaluronic acid, or other substances, have been reported to migrate around the face and body, with patients complaining of these implants not dissolving or difficulty removing them from the body. The FDA created a Filler Safety Panel document by Steven F. Weiner, MD, in 2021 that doctors needed to present to patients on the risks involved before proceeding with treatment, but this has not slowed down the masses from going ahead despite the risks involved. This is just the tip of the iceberg. The rabbit hole goes further down. The horror stories include amputations, rotting flesh, vision issues, migraines, hair loss, lymphedema, and cancer have been reported, but not many are listening.

In conclusion, where do we draw the line? I’m not even sure the “line” exists anymore, just because of how far we’ve gone with superficial enhancements to the bodies of women and men. What has made women feel this way, where we risk our lives to hold onto youth that is bound to fade as we age? I don’t think this is an easy answer, but I believe it is a conversation we need to have on a larger scale if there is any hope in positively impacting the younger generations growing up around this abnormal obsession. I can understand genuine health conditions, accidents, and congenital disorders that require some of these procedures, but at the rate we as a society are going, it may end up being too late if something is not done to slow down this descent. This is indeed food for thought.

Until I come your way again, please like, comment, share, and follow for more.

Periwinkle Starr

Summer is Upon Us – Finding Cash in the Attic!

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Hello Y’all! I hope you’re doing great in your corner of the world. Summer is upon us, and it’s time to declutter and get ready for the new. Spring was amazing in North Texas. We had it way cooler than we usually get this time of the year, and it was fabulous! Spending time on long walks out on the trail, sitting on the deck, and enjoying the cool breeze and the sometimes annoying birds was a welcome treat.

Be Your Own King/Queen of Decluttering

You can do it.

I love to consider myself the Queen of de-cluttering ha-ha! But only because I believe living spaces should literally be just that – living spaces. I also have the belief that having balance in life is not just an internal thing, but also external. It’s also been proven by science that a person’s surroundings can often dictate what is going on mentally with a person. Even before my profession, growing up, I always liked balance, clean lines, a good use of space, marrying form and function, but also a sprinkle of “Feng Shui” aka funkshway – which is an ancient Chinese art and science focused on balancing the energies of a space to create harmony and enhance well-being. It involves arranging furniture and designing spaces to promote positive energy flow. Essentially, “Funk Schway” refers to the same principles of Feng Shui, aiming to create a harmonious environment.

As I swap out the last of my Spring items and organize my Summer wear, I extended this to the whole house; going through, organizing, throwing out, and setting items aside for resale. If you are a minimalist, this may not apply to you, but if you live like the rest of America….you probably have stuff sitting around that you don’t need or don’t use, and probably will never use, and is collecting dust. A lot of times in the past, I would tell myself I’d take care of it later, often reorganizing or temporarily storing it somewhere inconspicuous, but that didn’t address the issue.

My 3-Step Plan to Decluttering

  1. Re-Gifting
  2. Resale
  3. Trash (Dumpster or Recycling)

It is daunting to set aside time to declutter your space, whether its an office, your home, or a storage unit. To ease my brain into it, I like to break it up into small sections or a room with frequent breaks. Every qualifying item is grouped into one of the three categories above. There are a bunch of sites to resell items. Here’s a link to a list of 10 great sites: https://www.top10.com/best-places-to-sell-your-stuff-online

Folks, Summer is already knocking at the door. As we race into the sun, freeing our lives and personal spaces from clutter will go a long way in improving our health and wellness. Do it for you, do it for your family, do it for your space…because you deserve it. Until I come your merry way again, enjoy whats left of the cool and get ready for sunscreen, brain freezing cold drinks and lots of sunshine in North Texas. I remain…

Periwinkle Starr

It Only Takes A Little Courage.

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Hello Y’all! I hope you are doing well in your corner of the world. It’s already April, and one would have thought we were done with Winter. After changing out my wardrobe for Spring, the temperature dropped close to freezing over the last weekend. So, the heat came back on, and the layers had to come out….there goes our love/hate relationship with the Texas weather. Still, we won’t change it for a darn thing. Planting season is upon us, and I’m sprouting sweet mini peppers, okra, beefsteak tomatoes, and carrots this year. Can you imagine yours truly, the one who couldn’t keep anything alive only a few years ago? Well, today’s post is all about not giving up and having a little bit of courage, so stick around for some positivity.

I feel like life is a reel and it consist of the stories we tell ourselves through our experiences and what we could do to change those mindsets, narratives with the right information, being in the right groups of people, with the right encouragement, with people who force you to see a different viewpoint from yours.

Sometimes, we give up on dreams, on ventures, on projects, not because we didn’t believe in ourselves but a lot of times because we did not have the right information, enough knowledge, discernment, mentors, and a good support system. Failing is hard, and no one feels it more than the person who has a dream. There are so many people who I come across and those in my life who had dreams growing up that have been thrown in the ‘reality-check’ pile, which is also known as an excuse we tell ourselves for not going after our dreams. I truly believe that our happiness as people stems not from the amount of money we have, even though having money is not a bad thing. It is not dependent on the people surrounding us, our spouses or significant others or children, neither is it our jobs or material things we possess. I believe that what makes us truly and deeply happy in life are the simple things specific to us that give us joy.

I have met many people who were established in big corporations that left to open flower shops, coffee shops, be ranchers because that is what makes them happy.

Dare to Follow Your Heart

I’ve found the phrase ‘Life is a B****, and then you die’ to be funny but a true reality. But it only takes a little courage. I have so much respect for the people whose stories I have heard where they didn’t feel fulfilled, didn’t have inner happiness, and had to look themselves in the mirror one day and take a leap of faith. No one could understand; some said they were going through a phase while others said they would be back. But they stuck with it. They had a little courage, and many of these people have come out on the other side better. They’re happier, and the light in their eyes is back; their health is stable, and they enjoy the life they’ve always wanted…many a times with less or more money. I have seen people trade in seven-figure jobs to be part-time grocery store clerks, but they love the time they spend with their family. This could be whatever your happy place is.

I admire those who went against the norm to pursue their dream, their happiness even when it did not make sense. Those who dared to have the courage to say no to a bad arrangement, a bad relationship, a bad decision and deciding to turn the course even though they had already wasted so many years on the wrong path. All it takes is beginning with a little courage, trying again, but this time with the right information, a better understanding of the situation, a team of mentors, and not being afraid of what you don’t know. Friends, life is too short to not fight for your dream; dare to have courage. It’s better to try and fail than not have tried at all. Until I come your merry way again, like, follow and share.

Periwinkle Starr

Having the Courage to Walk Away.

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Hello Y’all! I hope you are doing well in your corner of the world. The eclipse is here and unfortunately, we have thunderstorms in my little corner in North Texas, so i probably won’t be seeing anything but rain and storm clouds. Over the weekend, some friends of mine and a few others helped organize an easter egg hunt which was fun for a community of kids but quite a workout for us the adults however, it was still fun, and the weather was gorgeous.

Today’s post is none other but ‘having the courage to walk away’. Life is beautiful and I believe it happens in stages and cycles, and not just physical growth alone. We keep on growing and advancing as we pass each phase and if we fail, life has a way of taking us back around until we pass the test – which could be anything from an area of growth needed in character, emotions, self-control or a literal test.

Growing up in a close-knit family with a bunch of siblings, I began to learn early about boundaries among my brothers and sisters such things like you couldn’t bite anyone else, pull their hair, fight over toys and things of that nature. As simple as this may sound, these rules began forming what I call ‘lines’ that I could not violate and should not be violated by others. I believe majority of the populace have this; but like anything that isn’t exercised regularly, over time, our lines become weak which can bring on a passivity that is neither healthy nor serve us long term.

Life and Relationships

I believe life has blessed us with relationships in every sphere and includes family relationships, love, friendships, business, religious, fitness, social groups and everything in between. Having healthy and wholesome relationships filled with genuine interest, care and respect is beneficial to all involved and does require some effort by the parties concerned for such things like showing up, being present and overall, just doing life together and all that it entails.

Sometimes in the course of these relationships, interactions may not be pleasant, some may be abusive, others demanding, unfair, non-supportive, flat out disrespectful, toxic and unhealthy. This occurs when the relationships do not positively add to our lives and well-being but take, devalue, disrespect and even in some cases are harmful to the individual or individuals concerned. Just from personal experiences and experiences shared with me by others in confidence voicing dissatisfaction, an absence of validation or not just getting anything close to what we’re giving or dishing out is all too real.

Instantly cutting people off or excluding oneself may not always be the first line of action for majority of us. But there comes a time when, one person can no longer shoulder the burden, is dissatisfied, unhappy and cannot see any change in sight; this is where I feel having the courage to move on is the best option. This could be temporary or in some cases, it may be permanent depending on the circumstances.

Some Reasons to Walk Away

*When a relationship tears down and isolates an individual instead of building up and flourishing in community.

*Blatant disrespect for one’s humanity.

*One sided pairing(s) that serve only one party ‘all-the-time’.

*Any kind of abuse – physical, verbal, emotional, mental etc.

*Toxicity – Need I say more.

Folks, I wrote this post not just for you all but for myself as well. Wherever you are in the world, know that you are a human being, and you deserve the dignity and respect to live, to thrive, to flourish and go after your dreams in life. As everyday people, we will always be a work in progress ourselves and those we are in community with. Living life in a healthy and safe environment with others is doable and possible. Sometimes we, need to have the courage to walk out of bad relationships so our eyes can be opened to the good all around us. For some, walking away may not be entirely possible, but I dare say that strengthening our boundaries will certainly go a long way.

Until I come your way again, please like, follow, and comment. 2024 feels like it’s going to be a unique year so let’s clean house and walk away from things that no longer mutually benefit us. I remain,

Periwinkle Starr